


can you save my heavydirtysoul?

by Mongo00



Category: Twenty One Pilots
Genre: Alternate Universe - High School, Anxiety, Bullying, Friendship, Gen, Implied/Referenced Suicide, References to Depression, Self-Harm, not popular tyler, popular josh
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-03-06
Updated: 2018-03-06
Packaged: 2019-03-27 18:29:45
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,239
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13886613
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Mongo00/pseuds/Mongo00
Summary: Josh walks into Pines High School with confidence. Through the hallways, Josh waves to many familiar faces and smiles._____Tyler walks into Pines High School with fear. Through the hallways, Tyler avoids eye contacts and shuffles his feet as quietly as possible.





	can you save my heavydirtysoul?

Josh walks into Pines High School with confidence. Through the hallways, Josh waves to many familiar faces and smiles.

Josh isn’t dubbed as popular, just well known. He’s nice to everyone, has a great sense of humor, and is caring. Everyone who has met Josh loves him. People gravitate towards his outward extroverted personality and kindness. 

Josh is involved in countless student organizations and takes pride in leading many of them. He has amazing connections with his peers, teachers, and admin. Josh is an overall lovable person that loves to help others. 

Josh is so loved that he belongs to four different friend groups. He hangs out with and loves them all equally.

Josh isn’t the stereotypical jock or popular kid. People aren’t afraid to talk to him. Josh is smart (really smart), but also has a great personality. 

Life is a nice ride for Josh as he walks down the school hallway, entering his first classroom.  
_____

Tyler walks into Pines High School with fear. Through the hallways, Tyler avoids eye contacts and shuffles his feet as quietly as possible. 

Tyler isn’t dubbed as the strange geeky kid, just not well accepted. He spends his days at school trying to go unnoticed. Not many people even know that Tyler exists and those who do act like they don’t. 

Tyler is a placeholder. He isn’t involved in any school activities and doesn’t socialize; he likes it like that. 

Tyler doesn’t belong to a friend group. He often goes through the school day not uttering a single word. He tends to spend lunch time walking around campus or napping, trying to get as far away from his peers as possible. 

Tyler isn’t the stereotypical weird kid. He’s just antisocial and people don’t seem to take interest in him. If anything, people look at him as a target. Tyler has a sweet personality, but no one knows that. The only thing people know is that he is an easy victim. 

Life is an unwanted burden for Tyler as he walks down the school hallway, entering his first classroom.  
_____

Josh and Tyler have the same first period: English 11. 

Josh is in regular English because he is taking four other AP’s; Tyler is in regular English because he has no motivation to do anything more despite being capable. 

Both take their regular seats: Josh sitting in the font center surrounded by his friends and Tyler sitting in the back corner with no one in a one desk radius of him. 

The two don’t acknowledge each other. Josh doesn’t know that Tyler exists, but Tyler knows that Josh exists (how can he not?). 

The rest of English goes by uneventfully, both boys completing classwork to pass time. As the bell rings, everyone files out of the classroom and moves on with their school day.  
_____

By the time lunch arrives, Josh goes off campus with his friends to the nearest Taco Bell. He spends the half hour goofing off with his friends and shouting along to lyrics in his car while driving back to school.  
_____

Tyler spends the half hour mindlessly walking down the sidewalk with earbuds blasting music through his ears.

Tyler sees Josh drive back to PHS and looks at him longingly. It feels like the universe is mocking him, as if the constant ridicule from his peers wasn’t enough. 

Tyler doesn’t go back to school for the rest of the day. He instead lays down on the grass lawn in the front of PHS and takes a nap, waiting for school to end. 

Tyler couldn’t drive; he has his license, but no car. It’s sad, being a junior and still relying on your parents to pick you up. 

When the school day comes to an end, Tyler knows that he should get out of the way, but shit will happen to him either way. The group always finds a way. 

The bell rings and Tyler just embraces himself for whatever is coming his way today. 

Sitting up, he pulls his sweatshirt hood over his head, but that doesn’t stop the group. 

“Hey! Fag! You can’t hide from us.” The leader of the group calls as his posse descends down the hill. 

Yes, Tyler’s gay. That’s a huge reason why he’s alone, but not the only one. Tyler tried to make friends and to participate in school sports. He got rejected from all sport teams and friend groups. 

“What are you doing just sitting there? You’re taking up precious space Ty Ty. You’d be better off dead.” The leader continues. 

Tyler stays quiet with his gaze glued to the floor. When the group has enough fun for the day, they keep moving ‘accidentally’ kicking dirt onto Tyler. 

Tyler is used to it by now; it’s been a year since it started. What Tyler isn’t used to is seeing his former best friend being the cause of it. 

The leader, Andy, used to be Tyler best (and only friend) before he turned his back on Tyler freshman year. Andy knew everything about Tyler and now uses every piece of it against him. 

When Tyler spots the familiar car, he stands up, brushes off his clothes, and climbs into the car.

The car ride back home is silent. Tyler doesn’t have a great relationship with either of his parents and doesn’t plan on forming one. 

The second they get home, Tyler hops out of the car and runs upstairs to his room. He drops his backpack on the floor and jumps onto his bed. He closes his eyes in hopes of escaping the pain of reality for a bit.  
_____

Josh is actively completing his homework from the moment he gets home. After three hours, Josh spends the rest of the day facetiming his friends and rocking out to music in his room. 

By the time dinner rolls around, Josh helps his mom cook dinner. After the family finishes eating, they all watch their favorite reality TV shows together. Josh is super close to his family and doesn’t know what he’d do without them. 

The Dun household hangs out together before saying goodnight.  
_____

Tyler eats dinner alone in his room. His dinner consisted of a makeshift collection of snacks that would fill his stomach. 

Tyler doesn’t leave his room unless forced and chooses not to interact with his family. He’s practically living in his room, alone (not that he minded). 

After throwing the wrappers into a pile on the floor, Tyler lays back on his bed and drifts off to sleep.  
_____

Josh is woken up in the morning by the delicious smell of a home-cooked breakfast. Josh gets ready with a spring in his step, excited for the day.  
_____

Tyler is woken up in the morning by screaming down the hall. He gets ready reluctantly and dreads the thought of school.  
_____

Josh gets to school and joins one of his friend groups. He jumps into their current conversation, laughing and smiling. They continue catching up until the bell rings, going their separate ways.  
_____

Tyler waits until the last minute possible to step foot onto school grounds. When he does, Tyler tries to be as invisible as humanly possible.  
_____

The rest of the school day goes normally for the two of them, including lunch and their after school routines. 

The only difference is that both of them are having a hard night.  
_____

Josh’s anxiety skyrocketed an hour ago and he has had four panic attacks within an hour and a half. 

He deals with this the only way he knows how: running.  
_____

At night, Tyler’s phone blows up with hateful messages. He knows that he should ignore them, but he reads them regardless. 

The only thing that those people don’t know is that Tyler hates himself just as much as they do.

So when he reads the 24th ‘kill yourself’ message, the cuts on his skin don’t suffice anymore.

He deals with this the only way he knows how: the bridge.  
_____

Josh begins running on his path down the familiar roads while listening to blink 182 through his earbuds. 

Running is Josh’s stress relief; all of his worries melt away and nothing other than the wind hitting his face matters.  
_____

Tyler jogs down his neighborhood street and down to the overpass bridge. He looks at the water rushing and crashing below him with envy. He finds hope in the distance between himself and the river bottom; hope of having no more pain. 

Tyler climbs over the barrier railing and sits on it, one inch away from falling. He looks into the dark horizon, trying to find the invisible light. He looks down to his shoes as he swings his feet wondering if this is really it. 

Tyler takes his blade out of his jacket pocket and begins to cut dozens of times on his arms in a last ditch effort before the final escape. The messages, voices, and pain rings through Tyler’s head as tears begin to flow down his face. 

This is it; Tyler can’t fight it anymore.  
_____

Josh follows the trail to the riverbend, a peaceful sanctuary for him. Planning to take a break from his run at the bridge, Josh jogs closer and listens to the serene sound of the moving water.

Opening his eyes after a few seconds, he sees a figure in the darkness. Curious, he walks closer. 

Josh looks at the figure hesitantly and cautiously. He makes out a black sweatshirt and black jeans, but he also hears faint crying. Josh snaps out of his observations when the figure stands up and leans away from the railing.

“Wait!” Josh yells at the person, running closer and causes the figure to quickly whip his head around. 

The person in black still stands on the other side of the railing, but is holding on. 

“Hey.” Josh starts, out of breath. “Hey, what’s wrong? Jumping is never the answer.”

Josh hears the person scoff before beginning: “What would you know mr. everyone loves me? Just go away and let me be gone.”

“Okay… I don’t know where that came from, but I want to help you. Please. I want to show you the reasons to stay alive.”

“You have everything, Josh. I have nothing. There’s no hope and there’s no point. Just go on with your life and forget that this ever happened.”

“Um, since you know my name, can I know yours?”

“Tyler.” He responds. “And if you just came here to tell me how worthless I am, I already know. Can you at least let me have my last few moments in peace?”

“Tyler, I don’t know what you’re going through, but I assure you that I’m not here to hurt you more. I just met you, but I care about you. I want to hear your story… if you’ll let me.”

“Why? Just so you can pity me more??” Tyler says and shakes his head in disgust.

“No, because I want to help you. I want to show you that I care and that you are worth living.” Josh says sincerely, being met with a blank expression from Tyler. “Is everything okay? I’m sorry if I got too emotional there…” Josh backtracks, obviously uncomfortable.

“I. No, no.” Tyler responds in disbelief. “Um, I’ve just. I’ve never heard that before.” Tyler continues in a whisper.

“I’m sorry to hear that, but I’m here for you now. I’m all ears for as long as you need Tyler.” Josh says, extending his hand out for Tyler to grab. When he doesn’t, Josh displays a puzzled expression on his face.

“I’m sorry Josh. I want to believe you, but I can’t. This is too good to be true. You’re just going to abandon me like everyone else did.”

“I’m not forcing you to believe me, but I promise you that I have no bad intentions. I just want you to know that I care about you and that I’m not leaving until I know that you’re safe.” Josh urges, further gesturing to his open hand. 

After a few seconds of contemplation, Tyler accepts Josh’s hand and climbs back over the railing.  
_____

Tyler doesn’t tell Josh much. 

He doesn’t want to share his sob story with someone who would just pretend to care. Tyler shares his suicidal thoughts, however. 

Josh is the only person that Tyler feels safe around. He knows it’s irrational to become attached so quickly and that Josh will most likely forget about him, but it’s nice to feel like someone cares. 

The two talk into the late morning and end up sleeping on the bridge bench before heading off to school. They bonded through their interests and Tyler would call Josh his friend.

Sadly, Tyler knows that this friendship will be over in the next hours of the day as both of them will go back to their old lives and none of this encounter will matter. 

Despite Tyler’s assumptions, the opposite happens:

Josh leaves his friends to sit next to Tyler in English.  
Josh invites Tyler to eat lunch with him, but they end up eating alone because Tyler is too anxious to meet new people.  
Josh defends Tyler when Andy comes back around.  
Josh invites Tyler to hang out at his house after school.

Josh makes Tyler feel loved and wanted; they make each other happy. 

They’re going to be okay after all.


End file.
